We made it safely to Montana on Thursday evening...and as I expected, it's been go-go-go all weekend! But it's Monday morning now, and thanks to $200 worth of big fireworks that the other uncle brought, and $25 worth of little fireworks that my 7-year old nephew bought with is hard-earned money from pulling weeds on the ranch, it appears that everyone else is sleeping in....so I finally have a quiet moment to myself.
We've been having a great time, albeit it a bit busy. This little town of 500 has probably tripled in size (at least!) for their Centennial Celebration. My husband got to reconnect with some of his old high school friends, and I think that he has really enjoyed showing off his pregnant wife. As soon as we saw his sisters and his mom, they each rubbed my belly. I was totally expecting his mom to do so, but I was a bit surprised at his sisters. Other than that, I think that there was only one other belly rub from a stranger (well, "stranger" to me..."family friend" to everyone else). But I willingly offered to let my nieces feel our Baby Girl's kicks--when my 10-year old niece felt it, her (already huge and beautiful) eyes met mine, and I could tell that she truly comprehended the significance of the sensation when she said "that's awesome!". The 5-year old was surprised and elated, and asks me multiple times throughout the day if I've felt her kick yet, hoping to get the chance to feel it again. And then at lunch, the topic of babies came up, and she informed us all that babies come out of the mommy's belly button--to which her mom (the doctor) quickly chimed in "yep...that's where they come from" (apparently they haven't had "the talk" yet).
Today we head to the cabin that we rented for my mother-in-law as a Christmas gift, and then my husband and I will hit the road from there for our return trip. I felt really good (physically) on the way up, so I'm hoping to feel just as good on the way home. We did end up stopping at some pretty nasty bathrooms, so I'm hoping that we can avoid those on the return trip. It hasn't been quite the "relaxing vacation" that we envisioned, but it has definitely been good.
Today's blessing is the chance to go explore the ranch this morning. They got crazy amounts of rain this spring (and even last night after the fireworks), so everything is so green and absolutely beautiful. I absolutely love this area, and look forward to retiring here with my husband someday.
Monday, July 5, 2010
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Prayers for Janet: Her Water Broke
We're about to hit the road, but I wanted to share this update from Janet:
"Hi Everyone,
First of all, thank you again for your prayers during this most difficult time. As you have all heard, it has been confirmed that my water has been broken. I have tried to remain calm and very positive when all this happened so quickly.
At 6:45 pm yesterday my water broke. I felt a warm gush of liquid and sensed something wasn't right. The nurse immediately tested my fluids and it turned out positive for amniotic fluid coming from the baby's sac. We did a quick speculum exam and was very scared they would have to cut the stitch which meant I would have to deliver right away. I'm only 25 weeks! Even though the stitch was slightly pulling they decided it was best to leave it in. For those who don't understand, a stitch can be very dangerous and can damage my cervix especially if it's pulling hard. If I dilate any more or contract this will be very dangerous for me and they will force to cut the stitch and deliver. Right now my cervix is very soft. So think of it as butter and putting a string through it.
The other danger is possibility of infection for the baby and I, which is why I will be put on antibiotics for 7 days. If either one of us show infection, then we will have to deliver right away. If the doctors don't administer the antibiotics, the body would have naturally gave birth within 48 hours. Studies have shown antibiotics to slow the birthing process somehow. The doctors are hoping I can buy more time, at least 7 more days (even with my water broken). After 7 days they will take me off antibiotics.
Everyday they will monitor me with a fetal monitor and do a fetal stress test to make sure the baby is doing ok. Even though I am leaking large amounts of amniotic fluid, the baby produces urine and is producing liquid everyday. The main concern is if there's infection or contractions. I'm praying for none of these.
Right now I'm in Labor and Delivery, and though I was contracting here and there, after they administered the IV fluids in me, it died down shortly. Thank God! I was praying I wouldn't deliver yesterday. Another prayer answered and now I'm 25 weeks and 2 days. 5 more days to reach 26 weeks! Each day counts that baby Madison is in my womb.
So it is definite that I will not be going anywhere until I deliver this baby at this hospital. Though it was the desire of my heart to hang in there for 34 weeks and transfer to Newton Wellesley... I am thankful for each new day God allows Madison to grow in my womb.
So, just to give everyone hope and the continual desire to pray... I have heard some women have made it as far as 33-34 weeks even with their waters broken earlier than I. But of course every women's body is different. At this point, the doctor's have to watch me VERY closely because I can go into labor any day, any hour. And if I go into contractions, they told me they will not stop it. That is why I pray everyday that I will not contract or that my cervix will not dilate because the stitch will rip my cervix apart and they will be forced to cut the stitch and deliver right away.
Hopeful and positive thinking...but if in the event I make it to week 34 then they will have to deliver because studies have shown the growth in the womb reached its maximum effectiveness in developing the baby's organs...and any longer can be a greater cause for infection for the baby and I.
I have said everything I could possibly think of...I think the prayer requests are self explanatory. Its amazing how calm I am in this storm. I still have faith that Madison will be a healthy, bouncing baby :).
It's really amazing to see that I survived another day of this. And even though Madison's sac is leaking a lot every day, I know only God allowed her to stay in my womb each day. And each morning I wake up with a sigh of relief, and thank God for allowing her to stay an extra day to grow and mature her lungs, heart, brain and all that needs time to grow in my womb. I never thought I could love this child so much but even through this time of suffering, I consider it a blessing.
Thank you for your continuous support, prayers and faith!
Thank you,
Janet"
Her calmness and peace amaze me!
It was a great blessing to receive Janet's email this morning. I got a note from her friend last night indicating that her water had broken. I woke up periodically throughout the night, and prayed for her each time. From her email this morning, it's amazing to hear what the doctors can do with antibiotics and IV fluids! Her email gave me so much hope--especially as we're about to leave for vacation. And now we hit the road!
"Hi Everyone,
First of all, thank you again for your prayers during this most difficult time. As you have all heard, it has been confirmed that my water has been broken. I have tried to remain calm and very positive when all this happened so quickly.
At 6:45 pm yesterday my water broke. I felt a warm gush of liquid and sensed something wasn't right. The nurse immediately tested my fluids and it turned out positive for amniotic fluid coming from the baby's sac. We did a quick speculum exam and was very scared they would have to cut the stitch which meant I would have to deliver right away. I'm only 25 weeks! Even though the stitch was slightly pulling they decided it was best to leave it in. For those who don't understand, a stitch can be very dangerous and can damage my cervix especially if it's pulling hard. If I dilate any more or contract this will be very dangerous for me and they will force to cut the stitch and deliver. Right now my cervix is very soft. So think of it as butter and putting a string through it.
The other danger is possibility of infection for the baby and I, which is why I will be put on antibiotics for 7 days. If either one of us show infection, then we will have to deliver right away. If the doctors don't administer the antibiotics, the body would have naturally gave birth within 48 hours. Studies have shown antibiotics to slow the birthing process somehow. The doctors are hoping I can buy more time, at least 7 more days (even with my water broken). After 7 days they will take me off antibiotics.
Everyday they will monitor me with a fetal monitor and do a fetal stress test to make sure the baby is doing ok. Even though I am leaking large amounts of amniotic fluid, the baby produces urine and is producing liquid everyday. The main concern is if there's infection or contractions. I'm praying for none of these.
Right now I'm in Labor and Delivery, and though I was contracting here and there, after they administered the IV fluids in me, it died down shortly. Thank God! I was praying I wouldn't deliver yesterday. Another prayer answered and now I'm 25 weeks and 2 days. 5 more days to reach 26 weeks! Each day counts that baby Madison is in my womb.
So it is definite that I will not be going anywhere until I deliver this baby at this hospital. Though it was the desire of my heart to hang in there for 34 weeks and transfer to Newton Wellesley... I am thankful for each new day God allows Madison to grow in my womb.
So, just to give everyone hope and the continual desire to pray... I have heard some women have made it as far as 33-34 weeks even with their waters broken earlier than I. But of course every women's body is different. At this point, the doctor's have to watch me VERY closely because I can go into labor any day, any hour. And if I go into contractions, they told me they will not stop it. That is why I pray everyday that I will not contract or that my cervix will not dilate because the stitch will rip my cervix apart and they will be forced to cut the stitch and deliver right away.
Hopeful and positive thinking...but if in the event I make it to week 34 then they will have to deliver because studies have shown the growth in the womb reached its maximum effectiveness in developing the baby's organs...and any longer can be a greater cause for infection for the baby and I.
I have said everything I could possibly think of...I think the prayer requests are self explanatory. Its amazing how calm I am in this storm. I still have faith that Madison will be a healthy, bouncing baby :).
It's really amazing to see that I survived another day of this. And even though Madison's sac is leaking a lot every day, I know only God allowed her to stay in my womb each day. And each morning I wake up with a sigh of relief, and thank God for allowing her to stay an extra day to grow and mature her lungs, heart, brain and all that needs time to grow in my womb. I never thought I could love this child so much but even through this time of suffering, I consider it a blessing.
Thank you for your continuous support, prayers and faith!
Thank you,
Janet"
Her calmness and peace amaze me!
It was a great blessing to receive Janet's email this morning. I got a note from her friend last night indicating that her water had broken. I woke up periodically throughout the night, and prayed for her each time. From her email this morning, it's amazing to hear what the doctors can do with antibiotics and IV fluids! Her email gave me so much hope--especially as we're about to leave for vacation. And now we hit the road!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Vacation!
We head up to Montana bright and early tomorrow morning! I'm very excited for this vacation...yes, even including the 24-hour drive. I'm getting to the point where it's probably safe to fly...but might not be the best mode of transportation. We're also bringing up the drum set that my husband so generously dismantled to make room for the nursery, and we'll bring home a glider that my mother-in-law picked up for us (assuming that I like the design). It will take us two days to get there, and two days to get back--which means that we'll be spending the night in Colorado each way. And yes, my husband has already agreed to stop as much as I need to in order to let me pee and walk around.
This isn't quite the exotic pre-baby-vacation that I may have envisioned at one point, but it totally works for us. I adore my husband's family...at least 98% of the time. They have definitely made me feel like an important part of the family. I admit that I'm a little bit worried that it's going to be a go-go-go sort of week with all of the "Centennial Reunion" activities planned for the little town of 500. Additionally, it's charming that they all know each other...but it's a little weird to be an "outsider" (especially when my mother in law is quite "involved" in the community). I'm also a bit concerned about the type of comments that might be made about our pregnancy (the general theme from the parents at Orientation was that I look too small, so I wonder if I'll hear similar things while we're there). So yes...a few little worries and concerns here and there, but ultimately, I'm very excited to get away.
Today's blessing was a promotion and a raise at work! I couldn't ask for a better way to finish my last day of work before heading out for the weekend. God is good!
This isn't quite the exotic pre-baby-vacation that I may have envisioned at one point, but it totally works for us. I adore my husband's family...at least 98% of the time. They have definitely made me feel like an important part of the family. I admit that I'm a little bit worried that it's going to be a go-go-go sort of week with all of the "Centennial Reunion" activities planned for the little town of 500. Additionally, it's charming that they all know each other...but it's a little weird to be an "outsider" (especially when my mother in law is quite "involved" in the community). I'm also a bit concerned about the type of comments that might be made about our pregnancy (the general theme from the parents at Orientation was that I look too small, so I wonder if I'll hear similar things while we're there). So yes...a few little worries and concerns here and there, but ultimately, I'm very excited to get away.
Today's blessing was a promotion and a raise at work! I couldn't ask for a better way to finish my last day of work before heading out for the weekend. God is good!
Monday, June 28, 2010
I Passed The Test
...the glucose screening test, that is.
I went in for my glucose screening last Monday...and then never heard back from them about the results. (By the way--I didn't think that the drink was all that bad--it kind of reminded me of the fruit punch that they often served at church picnics and such). So I called this morning and left a message for the lab nurse to call me back. Of course, I was in the restroom when she called back so I didn't get to ask her about any details--but her message said that everything came back normal.
Praise God! I've really tried to be so careful with the amount of sugars and gluten in my diet ever since being diagnosed with PCOS (and my OB still isn't 100% convinced that I actually have PCOS since I'm so asymptomatic...but the RE's tests in February 2009 indicated something related to inverse hormone levels...which are related to elevated insulin levels...so I've been on Metformin ever since). Yes, I'm fully aware that the Metformin "helps" to regulate my insulin and glucose levels (and thus my hormone levels), but I'd like to think that my choices in what I put in my mouth (and therefore into our baby girl) helped me to pass the test as well. I do admit that my first thought was "well now I can eat a piece of the cheesecake that I brought into the office today!"...but I restrained myself (though I did have a bite of the mini-cheesecake I made for my husband last night).
If I remember correctly, this is my last round of bloodwork. Since I had to reschedule our next appointment due to our vacation plans, I still have a little over two weeks until I get to see our baby girl again. But I'm nearing the end of my second trimester...and even though I never put a pregnancy ticker on my blog, I know that we're in the double-digits for days remaining. I'm feeling pretty good, and yet I'm still acutely aware that anything is possible. I just take it one day at a time, and pray that God continue to sustain me and this pregnancy as He has thus far.
Today's blessing was being able to convince my husband to take one more day of vacation. He's as committed to his work as I often am, but I know how much he loves his family and yearns to spend quality time with them. We're leaving soon for his little tiny town's "Centennial Reunion" over the Fourth of July weekend, and since his mom and sister are super-involved with the plans, I know it will be a busy time. But then he and his sisters arranged for the whole family to rent a cabin a few hours away for next Monday and Tuesday nights. My husband was initially intent on leaving on Tuesday so that he could return to work on Thursday (did I mention we're driving?), but I knew that he would regret leaving the cabin early. So he called from work today to let me know that he was able to work it all out so that we can stay that extra night. I appreciate and understand his commitment to work, but I know that it will be a wonderful blessing to spend the extra time with his family.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
First Belly Rub
As we were leaving church this morning, I had my first experience with someone rubbing my belly. Actually--I take that back--I guess a good friend rubbed my belly weeks ago when I just started to show....but she was a close friend, so that doesn't count. This was the first "unexpected" or "unsolicited" belly rub.
I guess that this woman isn't a complete stranger. When I first found out that I was pregnant, I went to our "Prayer Garden" after church to ask for prayers, and she was one of the women who was on "prayer duty" that morning. At the time, she asked if she could place her hands on my stomach as she prayed for me and our baby, which I thought was a very sweet gesture. So I guess that she has a vested interest in my pregnancy--but I still wouldn't feel comfortable rubbing her belly.
I admit that it made me just a little bit uncomfortable. If it weren't for our previous bonding moment in the Prayer Garden, I think that I would have been really uncomfortable. At least it wasn't a complete stranger...and I know that she is excited for us. We'll see if it happens in public with a complete stranger...
This weekend's blessing was the chance to rearrange the house a bit to accommodate the nursery. But in order to do so, my husband had to consolidate his "man cave" so that we could turn that room into the guest room; and turn what was the guest room into what is now the nursery. In doing so, my husband made a really unselfish gesture and packed up his precious drum set. I admit that I actually teared up a bit as he started to dismantle the set, but there really is no way for us to keep it in the house. I promised him that he can buy an electric kit sometime which is smaller and quieter...but I know that this set was special to him.
I guess that this woman isn't a complete stranger. When I first found out that I was pregnant, I went to our "Prayer Garden" after church to ask for prayers, and she was one of the women who was on "prayer duty" that morning. At the time, she asked if she could place her hands on my stomach as she prayed for me and our baby, which I thought was a very sweet gesture. So I guess that she has a vested interest in my pregnancy--but I still wouldn't feel comfortable rubbing her belly.
I admit that it made me just a little bit uncomfortable. If it weren't for our previous bonding moment in the Prayer Garden, I think that I would have been really uncomfortable. At least it wasn't a complete stranger...and I know that she is excited for us. We'll see if it happens in public with a complete stranger...
This weekend's blessing was the chance to rearrange the house a bit to accommodate the nursery. But in order to do so, my husband had to consolidate his "man cave" so that we could turn that room into the guest room; and turn what was the guest room into what is now the nursery. In doing so, my husband made a really unselfish gesture and packed up his precious drum set. I admit that I actually teared up a bit as he started to dismantle the set, but there really is no way for us to keep it in the house. I promised him that he can buy an electric kit sometime which is smaller and quieter...but I know that this set was special to him.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Prayers and Praise From Janet
Yesterday evening, I got the following prayer request from Janet:
"Hi Everyone,
I will make this short because I'm in a lot of pain. It's been almost 1 week from my last update. As you all know I'm praying to reach my next milestone: 28 weeks. I'm 24 wks and 4 days.
I've been cramping and contracting everyday now and now it's unbearable. Today's ultrasound will be my last. It will be too dangerous and risky to do another one. I had feared the worst and know I am down to practically no cervix and 1 cm dilated (the doctor can fit 1 finger in my cervix). But my stitch is still closed. When I gave birth to Jacob I was 3 cm and I gave birth in less than 10 minutes.
So there's nothing stopping Madison from going through my cervix other than a tiny stitch. Which I know wants to give because I feel stinging pain down there. Madison is head down and in the u/s I can see why I'm in pain. She keeps pushing down. I saw air bubbles in my cervix everytime she pushed. Scary!
Seeing how fast within each week my cervix deteriorated and is now gone and I'm dilated. I'm trying to have faith as small as a mustard seed and believe God wants this tiny blessing to be healthy baby. She was 1lb, 3oz last Monday. Now she's measuring 1lb, 7oz. I still pray for 28 weeks even though it seems impossible. But I know God can do the impossible. Please pray along with me and I hope these contractions stop and the dilation will not get bigger or birth is inevitable. I'm looking at all the positive things: She is viable, she received her steroids, she is growing and adding weight, the water has not broke and she can still get her nutrients and oxygen from the placenta so each day counts, she does not have an infection...each day in utero equals 2 days out of NICU.
Thank you... I can no longer accept visitors because I'm in a lot of pain. I am in laydown mode until I give birth. I pray that each day that goes by, I can open my eyes and thank God for each prayer answered. I never thought it would get more difficult than it already has.
So thank you and continue to pray with me daily!!!
Love and blessings!
Janet"
This was the first time that Janet sounded "frustrated" to me, and I found myself feeling a bit defeated as well as I headed to bed. I woke up this morning and recognized that I was feeling this way, and prayed that God restore my faith and give us some home. He heard our prayers, and here is the more encouraging update and praise from Janet today:
"So a quick update today...
Despite the fact I have no cervix and I'm already dilated...the pains subsided after cramping 12 hours straight all day yesterday. I had some cramping for 1/2 hour today but it went away.
Thank you...God must have heard your prayers and though I was worried to sleep, I slept well, considering. So after speaking with the drs & nurse, they said the next time I go into contractions, they have to check my cervix to see how much I've dilated...(they prefer to avoid this.). In the event I do, they will give me tocolytics to stop contractions. I hope to avoid contractions because it can cause the cervix to dilate some more...
My nurse told me in the years she has been here...patients who have visitors proved to have done better than those who don't. I told her that I didn't want visitors but she advised against that because if you're alone you tend to have more anxiety.
I rethought that and it does make sense. A social life, whether talking on the phone will help my sanity. I am so thankful for the friends that called and visited already. It has given me strength to make it in the past 2 1/2 weeks I was not going to make it. I know some of you don't know what to say, but if you don't, I ask you to continue to pray...
We definitely have an army of prayer, from Germany to Arizona, from Korea to Ohio, from Canada to Chicago, from NY to CT, from California to Boston, from NJ to Texas...and so more much more...
My parents call me daily morning and day to give me a bible verse and pray. My hubby is here almost every night to sleep by my side. I get encouraging prayer letters and emails daily. From long to short and daily text messages. But they all uplift me and mean soooo much. I thank God for making me strong and giving me hope to hang in there for baby Madison.
I have a baby blanket, though not perfect...I taught myself on youtube. I stopped for a while because I was discouraged. But the social worker came by to give me a pretty pink blanket crocheted and donated to the hospital. I thought I can't give up now on Madison, I came this far... So I picked up my blanket (the project I started at 13 weeks when I was on bedrest after my surgery). The blanket symbolizes hope to continue on and finish the task on which I begun. I remember the Chaplain at Newton Wellsley who said to me...stitch in time. I could not agree more. The Chaplain here who I didn't even call, came on a day where I shed tears...and I shared my prayer of hope that God will provide a ram like He did with Abraham. A great story of faith. So as each passes by...I know God has once again answered and given me hope each day. I intend to finish this crochet blanket because I believe and have faith. And even though the ball of yarn seems like it will take forever (just like the weeks ahead)...I continue to strive for each new day of hope.
Thank you for hearing me out...by faith I believe Madison will be a healthy baby.
Each day, no matter how dim it may be...I count my blessings one by one. I thank God for all of you who are in my life right now. My parents, brother, cousins, aunts, church, friends, pastors, bible study girls, bloggers, strangers, coworkers...thank you. There is so much gratitude in my heart for each and every individual in my life. Words right now are so indescribable--it overwhelms me the love and support I get.
Well, time to rest...today's blessing is another day of Madison in my womb and the pains have significantly decreased from yesterday.
THANK THANK THANK YOU!!!
Love,
Janet"
Her hope, faith, and trust in God inspire me! If she hasn't given up hope, then I shouldn't either. Please continue to pray for her and Madison.
My blessing today is having my husband home. After two weeks with the Army, and then a week away for work, he's now home...and doesn't have any plans to leave any time soon (other than vacation together next week).
"Hi Everyone,
I will make this short because I'm in a lot of pain. It's been almost 1 week from my last update. As you all know I'm praying to reach my next milestone: 28 weeks. I'm 24 wks and 4 days.
I've been cramping and contracting everyday now and now it's unbearable. Today's ultrasound will be my last. It will be too dangerous and risky to do another one. I had feared the worst and know I am down to practically no cervix and 1 cm dilated (the doctor can fit 1 finger in my cervix). But my stitch is still closed. When I gave birth to Jacob I was 3 cm and I gave birth in less than 10 minutes.
So there's nothing stopping Madison from going through my cervix other than a tiny stitch. Which I know wants to give because I feel stinging pain down there. Madison is head down and in the u/s I can see why I'm in pain. She keeps pushing down. I saw air bubbles in my cervix everytime she pushed. Scary!
Seeing how fast within each week my cervix deteriorated and is now gone and I'm dilated. I'm trying to have faith as small as a mustard seed and believe God wants this tiny blessing to be healthy baby. She was 1lb, 3oz last Monday. Now she's measuring 1lb, 7oz. I still pray for 28 weeks even though it seems impossible. But I know God can do the impossible. Please pray along with me and I hope these contractions stop and the dilation will not get bigger or birth is inevitable. I'm looking at all the positive things: She is viable, she received her steroids, she is growing and adding weight, the water has not broke and she can still get her nutrients and oxygen from the placenta so each day counts, she does not have an infection...each day in utero equals 2 days out of NICU.
Thank you... I can no longer accept visitors because I'm in a lot of pain. I am in laydown mode until I give birth. I pray that each day that goes by, I can open my eyes and thank God for each prayer answered. I never thought it would get more difficult than it already has.
So thank you and continue to pray with me daily!!!
Love and blessings!
Janet"
This was the first time that Janet sounded "frustrated" to me, and I found myself feeling a bit defeated as well as I headed to bed. I woke up this morning and recognized that I was feeling this way, and prayed that God restore my faith and give us some home. He heard our prayers, and here is the more encouraging update and praise from Janet today:
"So a quick update today...
Despite the fact I have no cervix and I'm already dilated...the pains subsided after cramping 12 hours straight all day yesterday. I had some cramping for 1/2 hour today but it went away.
Thank you...God must have heard your prayers and though I was worried to sleep, I slept well, considering. So after speaking with the drs & nurse, they said the next time I go into contractions, they have to check my cervix to see how much I've dilated...(they prefer to avoid this.). In the event I do, they will give me tocolytics to stop contractions. I hope to avoid contractions because it can cause the cervix to dilate some more...
My nurse told me in the years she has been here...patients who have visitors proved to have done better than those who don't. I told her that I didn't want visitors but she advised against that because if you're alone you tend to have more anxiety.
I rethought that and it does make sense. A social life, whether talking on the phone will help my sanity. I am so thankful for the friends that called and visited already. It has given me strength to make it in the past 2 1/2 weeks I was not going to make it. I know some of you don't know what to say, but if you don't, I ask you to continue to pray...
We definitely have an army of prayer, from Germany to Arizona, from Korea to Ohio, from Canada to Chicago, from NY to CT, from California to Boston, from NJ to Texas...and so more much more...
My parents call me daily morning and day to give me a bible verse and pray. My hubby is here almost every night to sleep by my side. I get encouraging prayer letters and emails daily. From long to short and daily text messages. But they all uplift me and mean soooo much. I thank God for making me strong and giving me hope to hang in there for baby Madison.
I have a baby blanket, though not perfect...I taught myself on youtube. I stopped for a while because I was discouraged. But the social worker came by to give me a pretty pink blanket crocheted and donated to the hospital. I thought I can't give up now on Madison, I came this far... So I picked up my blanket (the project I started at 13 weeks when I was on bedrest after my surgery). The blanket symbolizes hope to continue on and finish the task on which I begun. I remember the Chaplain at Newton Wellsley who said to me...stitch in time. I could not agree more. The Chaplain here who I didn't even call, came on a day where I shed tears...and I shared my prayer of hope that God will provide a ram like He did with Abraham. A great story of faith. So as each passes by...I know God has once again answered and given me hope each day. I intend to finish this crochet blanket because I believe and have faith. And even though the ball of yarn seems like it will take forever (just like the weeks ahead)...I continue to strive for each new day of hope.
Thank you for hearing me out...by faith I believe Madison will be a healthy baby.
Each day, no matter how dim it may be...I count my blessings one by one. I thank God for all of you who are in my life right now. My parents, brother, cousins, aunts, church, friends, pastors, bible study girls, bloggers, strangers, coworkers...thank you. There is so much gratitude in my heart for each and every individual in my life. Words right now are so indescribable--it overwhelms me the love and support I get.
Well, time to rest...today's blessing is another day of Madison in my womb and the pains have significantly decreased from yesterday.
THANK THANK THANK YOU!!!
Love,
Janet"
Her hope, faith, and trust in God inspire me! If she hasn't given up hope, then I shouldn't either. Please continue to pray for her and Madison.
My blessing today is having my husband home. After two weeks with the Army, and then a week away for work, he's now home...and doesn't have any plans to leave any time soon (other than vacation together next week).
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Embracing the Heat
One of my former staff members--who is also pregnant--was lamenting the fact that she had wished that it would warm up. After doing her undergrad in Arizona, she now lives in Oregon. I lived in Oregon for two years--including one glorious summer (and two dreadfully wet winters). I know summers in Oregon--they are absolutely beautiful! It was 78 degrees in Oregon today (and yes, she recognizes that she is spoiled).
It was 109 degrees in Arizona today.
And yet, I can't complain. How can I? I'm pregnant! This is what I've wanted so dearly for so long! I live in the desert, and it gets hot here. It just so happens that the second half of my pregnancy happens to correspond with the hottest summer months. What's there to complain about?
As I interact with more and more parents during Orientation (many of which are from out-of-town and out-of-state), they continue to pity me that I'm pregnant during the summer. While simultaneously trying to appreciate their concern for me, I try to sweetly explain that I'm simply embracing the heat as I enjoy my pregnancy. And I am--I'm enjoying my pregnancy, and it makes it so much easier to embrace this heat...even when it climbs above 100.
Perhaps my losses have changed my outlook and have helped me to develop a "no complaints" perspective. The due date for my first pregnancy would have been April 2009, and I remember feeling grateful at the time that I would be able to dodge the summer. Now, I'm just overwhelmingly grateful to be pregnant and to have things progressing. Who cares if it's hot?
But I feel like I have to be honest--I admit that I think that our AC is probably set a degree or two cooler than it was at this time last year...and I've been sleeping with only a sheet...and I may have walked around the empty house yesterday afternoon in only my bra and panties. So along with the minor adjustments, I embrace the heat, and I cherish this experience of being pregnant. I don't care if we set record temperatures this year--Summer 2010 will always be special for me as the time when I carried our Baby Girl.
Today's blessing was a nice compliment from a student, letting me know that he appreciates that I've always been there for him. After that initial slow start to the summer, things have been so busy at work, and I've been feeling like I've been playing catch-up every day. So it was really nice to hear that I'm still making an impact--at least for this one student.
It was 109 degrees in Arizona today.
And yet, I can't complain. How can I? I'm pregnant! This is what I've wanted so dearly for so long! I live in the desert, and it gets hot here. It just so happens that the second half of my pregnancy happens to correspond with the hottest summer months. What's there to complain about?
As I interact with more and more parents during Orientation (many of which are from out-of-town and out-of-state), they continue to pity me that I'm pregnant during the summer. While simultaneously trying to appreciate their concern for me, I try to sweetly explain that I'm simply embracing the heat as I enjoy my pregnancy. And I am--I'm enjoying my pregnancy, and it makes it so much easier to embrace this heat...even when it climbs above 100.
Perhaps my losses have changed my outlook and have helped me to develop a "no complaints" perspective. The due date for my first pregnancy would have been April 2009, and I remember feeling grateful at the time that I would be able to dodge the summer. Now, I'm just overwhelmingly grateful to be pregnant and to have things progressing. Who cares if it's hot?
But I feel like I have to be honest--I admit that I think that our AC is probably set a degree or two cooler than it was at this time last year...and I've been sleeping with only a sheet...and I may have walked around the empty house yesterday afternoon in only my bra and panties. So along with the minor adjustments, I embrace the heat, and I cherish this experience of being pregnant. I don't care if we set record temperatures this year--Summer 2010 will always be special for me as the time when I carried our Baby Girl.
Today's blessing was a nice compliment from a student, letting me know that he appreciates that I've always been there for him. After that initial slow start to the summer, things have been so busy at work, and I've been feeling like I've been playing catch-up every day. So it was really nice to hear that I'm still making an impact--at least for this one student.
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