What was once a toddler daybed has been reverted back to a crib, complete with a raised mattress and bumpers.
What was once a toddler dresser has been reverted back to a changing table, complete with pad and wipes warmer and diaper stacker.
What was once a closet holding 3T and 4T dresses and outfits has been reverted back to that of a newborn, complete with onesies and side-snap shirts with fold-over cuffs.
It was surreal to pull out those tiny little outfits that I cherished so dearly over two years ago. So many memories of this tiny new life that took over our home, our lives, and our hearts. Sure, some of these hand-me-downs have stains, but I'm sure that she'll be making adding some new stains of her own in no time. But don't worry--she's gotten a few new outfits of her own. But I might as well put Ella's hand-me-downs to good use since we have them. I took weekly pictures of Ella during her first year; I wonder if I'll end up having pictures of this new Baby Girl in the same outfit during the same week. I wonder if they'll even look alike.
As for me, I'm approaching the single-digit week countdown and things continue to go well. To everyone's surprise, I'm still running first thing in the morning. It's weird--I don't even feel pregnant when I'm running. I guess I can feel that I'm carrying an extra 30(+) pounds along with me which means I end up working harder, but my body feels good. Granted, I feel like I'm waddling by the end of the day, and I admit that it's getting harder and harder to get my running shoes on, but other than that, I feel good--and I'm so grateful.
June should fly by for us. Not only are we in to our Orientation time at work, but we've also go Ella signed up for parent-toddler swim lessons again for the month. It's just a half-hour after work, but it will make for some later evenings. We head to Wisconsin in a couple of weeks to spend time with my husband's family. I admit that I'm looking forward to the time off; but I'm really not looking forward to the flights and the swollen ankles that come with them! When we return, my dad will be spending some time in town on his sabbatical, and will then truly vacation with us for a couple of days. He's graciously agreed to watch Ella for a night or two so that my husband and I can get away for a bit. And then comes July...when we can truly try to get ready for this baby.
I know that I haven't written a lot lately, but please know that I still follow various journeys and am always excited to hear updates. I still value this community more that I can express, and it seems like many of us have found what we were looking for. I know that there are others out there who continue to search, and I don't feel like I'm ready to close this chapter quite yet. So even though I may write less, please know that I still care just as much.
My most recent blessing came earlier this week when Ella looked me straight in the eye and said "you're a good mom". Oh! It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it again! I've gotten some kind compliments in my life, but that one tops the list. I know I'm not perfect; I know that I could be more patient and probably should drop what I'm doing to pay more attention to her sometimes; but I sure try to be a good mom to this precious gift that God gave me. I know there will be times in the future when I embarrass her or she hates my decisions, but I hope that she'll always be able to see that I'm trying to be a good mom to her.