Since my husband is Korea with a 16 hour time difference, it's already Sunday for him, and therefore already Father's Day. I'll be honest--I'm a bit disappointed that he's not here to celebrate this first Father's Day with Ella. I know that it's significant for him.
By Father's Day 2009, I had already experienced all three losses (the third being just weeks before). But I felt like I was a mother to those three babies, and I felt that my husband was a father to them as well. I bought him a gift, but he downplayed the day. That day, he told me that until he holds a child in his arms, that he did not feel like a father. That broke my heart.
I get that men are different than women, and I can understand how he would fail to feel a sense of connection to those three babies. But I know that he's connected to Ella, and there's clearly no denying that she is his daughter. Look at the resemblance!
My husband is becoming a really good father to Ella. He still smiles at her the same way he did the very first time that he held her, and it warms my heart each time to see that sort of devotion and compassion show through on guy like him. We got to Skype with him today, and her face totally lit up when she heard his voice and saw his face on the screen. Likewise, his face lit up when he saw her crawl and say "da-da-da-da-da". Even though he's not here for this first Fathers Day with Ella, I anticipate celebrating with him when he returns, and look forward to plenty of more celebrations in the future.
I also want to recognize my own dad and what an amazing role model I had in him. I remember my dad volunteering in my classroom when I was little, and reading to my brothers and me each night. He coached my teams, and actually continues to help coach my high school's girls soccer team, even though I graduated more than 10 years ago. He has faithfully loved my mom for more than 30 years, and makes sure that my brothers and I know just how proud of us he is. And now, he's spreading that love to Ella and my niece. Here he is playing with Ella on his recent trip to visit us:
To both my husband and my dad, I love you both very much. Thank you for loving the girls in your lives.
Today's blessing was finding out that my very-dear friend's little sister and dad made is safely back from their adventure on Denali. It sounds like it was extremely treacherous at times, but God provided in bringing them down safely.
Wow, she does look like her dad! Have fun celebrating the first fathers day!
ReplyDeleteSo sorry he missed it! But glad you can skype and he can see his little clone. :)
ReplyDeleteWow! Thanks, Laura. You are so sweet! I love you!
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