Everything went fine at the appointment today. We have a heartbeat, though she didn't give me a specific number. But she says that everything looks good for 8 weeks, 6 days.
Based on what I thought was my last cycle, I was expecting six weeks exactly. I was expecting her not to be able to see anything definite with an external scan, and assuming that she would send me across the hall for an internal scan or schedule one for another week from now (oh how I was dreading the thought of waiting a week for confirmation, one way or the other). But sure enough, there on the screen, through my little belly, was a perfect little "jelly bean".
Except, it didn't look so little, measuring at 8 weeks, 6 days. My doctor cleared out the history of the machine, thinking that perhaps it was averaging my baby's measurements with those of a previous patient. Again, 8 weeks, 6 days.
My mind is still racing. I don't know what to think. I don't easily get flustered, but I'm still--two hours later--trying to do the mental conception calculations. What I thought was a light cycle around Thanksgiving may have been--must have been--implantation bleeding. The test that they ran on November 28th at my annual exam must have been simply one day too early. It still doesn't quite add up perfectly in my brain, but as my very-dear friend said, "God defies all natural laws".
I'm still stunned. I'm hopefully optimistic, but still stunned. Given my history, I don't feel like we're totally in the clear quite yet. My doctor graciously agreed to see us again in two weeks, and then I'll have the big screening another two weeks or so after that. Perhaps this will all start to sink in by then.
Thank you for your prayers and support. This community is so special to me, and I am so grateful for everyone who is rooting for us and praying for us. You truly are an amazing blessing to me.