I Think God is Picking on Me

I'm still breastfeeding Ella, and still haven't had a new cycle, so really don't know if I am indeed ovulating.  So every once in a while, I take a cheap pregnancy test, just to check.  We're not actively trying again, but I would be absolutely thrilled to be pregnant, if that's what God has in store for us.  So I wasn't too horribly disappointed yesterday when it turned out negative.  I tossed it in the trash, and didn't think much of it.

Until 2:00 this morning when I woke up feeling nauseous.  For grins and giggles, I reached into the trash, just to check again, just in case.  Somewhere in the last 19 hours, a vertical line had emerged, turning the "-" into a "+".  What?!  Figuring that perhaps it was just an evaporation line or something, I resolved to wait until the morning to try again.  Well this morning, it was negative again...but that little "control indicator" that is supposed to show that the test was properly completed didn't change.  What?!

So like I said, I think God is picking on me.

I know He's not really picking on me, or testing me, or torturing me.  I have a surprising sense of peace, and I trust His plan for our lives.  I would be absolutely thrilled to be pregnant again, but I also don't want to get ahead of myself.  With two mysterious test results, I'm thinking that it could be a bad batch of tests.  I've got two more from the same box, so I might as well give one a try tomorrow and see what happens.  I'll keep you posted.

My blessing today was my husband's sincere "woohoo!" reaction at the possibility of a new pregnancy.  He fully understands that the two tests were conflicting and perhaps ridden with errors in one way or another, but it's still nice to know that he would be excited to start this adventure all over again.