Thursday, January 31, 2013

Bad Dream

The mind does funny things.  The mind does some especially funny things when you sleep.  The mind does some pretty crazy things when you sleep when you're pregnant.

In one of my earlier pregnancies, I once dreamed that I was water skiing with the Queen of England on dolphins behind a huge ship.  That's the kind of dream that is fun to wake from, fun to remember, and fun to share the next day.

And then there are dreams like I had last night, of loss.

I'll spare you the details, but I was proud of myself for how I handled it, in the dream.  Even in the moment of loss, I sang--in my dream--"I will praise You in the storm", and asked my dad to bring me my cell phone so that I could text my very-dear friend and ask for prayers.

The dream of loss happened--twice--when I was pregnant with Ella.  I know enough to know that they aren't signs of impending doom, but rather, just my subconscious tapping in to legitimate fears. Even so, it doesn't make it any easier to shake the images or the feelings.  I've lived that nightmare before; I'm so relieved that I got to wake up this time to realize it was all just a bad dream.

Yesterday's blessing--before the dream--occurred during Ella's bathtime.  Out of no where, she turned to me and said, "I like you.  You're pretty."  I have never heard such sweet and genuine words.  What is the kindest acknowledgement that your child has shared with you?

2 comments:

  1. Awe I'm sorry. I hate those dreams. I've had them w/both pregnancies.

    My baby girl told me she likes my pretty eyes. She's always complementing. She has a servants heart.

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  2. I have those dreams, too. They get you right to the core and it's hard to forget them.

    W tells me all the time "You're my schweetie" but my favorite is when I put on a dress for a party and he said "Are you a princess?" Be still my heart! My little boy is going to have girls chasing him down!

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