They say that morning sickness is a good sign in a pregnancy...right? So why do my husband and family and friends (the limited few with whom we've shared the news) shake their heads and tell me that they hope that I don't have to go through it when I ask them to pray for morning sickness? Why won't anyone pray that I puke?
I want to experience this pregnancy to its full capacity, morning sickness (or all-day sickness) and all. I was actually excited when I broke out a week or so ago. It was before I had taken the test, so it gave me hope that something was happening with my hormones. (C'mon hormones! Do your work and make me sick!). After experiencing the three previous losses, I feel like I'm clinging to any symptom that may or may not be legitimate. The more times I can look at a list and say "I have that!", the better I feel. (However, I'm trying to stay clear of "Dr. Google" as much as possible...so I'm just thinking back to anything I've ever previously learned about pregnancies).
I guess I feel a little bit queasy from time to time, but I can't tell if I'm nauseous...or hungry...or if it's all just psychosomatic. To be sure, I want the knock-me-on-my-butt no-way-to-deny-it type of morning sickness. So really--I give you permission to pray that I puke.
Today's blessing is that my husband is motivated to clean the house...and he's perfectly content to let me relax and incubate. He's a computer nerd, and his recent projects have spilled out of his office and the "man cage" and have taken over our dining room table. I've tolerated his mess for a couple of weeks now, but I will be glad to have a presentable house again--especially since we have friends coming over next weekend for the Super Bowl. He's in a cleaning frenzy, and I'm perfectly content.